Ancient Egypt is rife with memorable figures, but few are more empowering than the female pharaohs. These women did everything from marry their own brothers to put on fake beads, just for the chance to rule their kingdoms. And yet, like a certain comedian, they get no respect. After all, what did King Tut ever do aside from die from a toothache? It's time to find your inner pharaoh, and once you do, make her proud. Make her proud .

1. When you catch someone staring your way, you...

a. Throw some shade. Beauty is a burden, but someone has to handle it with grace.

b. Find out where he's from, who's his family. With the right connections, you could get some nice gifts. Or build an unholy alliance with Rome.

c. Recoil. Unwanted attention is death.

d. Kick them in the 'nads for making direct eye contact with you.

2. The most personal info you'd give a guy you just met:

a. My pores were blessed by Ra, the king of the gods.

b. Seriously, what can you bring to the table? I'm trying to build an empire here.

c. Sometimes I like to picture what my mummified body will look like centuries from now. It makes me smile.

d. You may brush the shadow of my foot with your lips. But that is it.

3. What do you do if you're at a party and know no one?

a. Walk up to the most attractive male and start twerking.

b. Study each person's bone structure, then approach whoever's is most regal-looking.

c. Lock myself in a closet with the lights off and pretend I'm in a coffin.

d. Perch myself in the area with the best lighting while someone fans me with a palm frond.

4. How would your friends describe you?

a. Drop dead gorgeous.

b. Conniving, ruthless, confident.

c. A bitter gust of wind that rattles windows.

d. Flawless bitch.

5. The new guy at work seems to be interested in you. You:

a. Tell him to take a number.

b. Do a quick background check on Ancestry.com.

c. Ask him how he feels about morgues.

d. Are not even remotely aware of his existence.

6. What's your favorite indulgence?

a. Kiehl's moisturizer. (I know, it's for peasants.)

b. My pet snakes.

c. Embalming my cats.

d. Bestowing my servants with pet names.

7. If your life were a movie, what would it be?

a. Drop Dead Gorgeous

b. A Nightmare Before Christmas

c. Cleopatra

d. Life Is But a Dream: the Beyonce Documentary

Mostly A's: Nefertiti (18th Dynasty c.1336 BC)

You're beautiful, and you know it. You're a firm believer that clothes make the man, so you have no qualms about dressing like one in order to gain some power. Historians questions whether or not you actually ruled, but you just laugh your pretty little mummified head off.

Mostly B's: Cleopatra (c 51 BC)

You may be living under the stifling rules of patriarchy, but you know how to bend them to get your way. Even if that means (gag) marrying your brother. You'll do anything to get your way, and if you can't ... well, out come the snakes.

Mostly C's: Merneith (1st Dynasty c.3000 BC)

Poor you. You're one of the earliest pharaohs and the least remembered. What we do know about you is all associated with death. You were obsessed with it. Egypt is scattered with your many funerary monuments. Okay, girl, we get it.

Mostly D's: Hatshepsut (18th Dynasty c.1473-1458 BC)

You are the pharaoh all --both men and women-- aspire to be. You were one of the best things to ever happen to Egypt. You rocked a fake beard just to be taken seriously, and it paid off. Sure, you have your share of haters (IE: the bastards who tried to erase you from history), but they're just a funny little footnote on your epic ass.

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