By Kayla Blatchley

Taking a cue from Buzzfeed's recent list of internet terms, I decided to take a break from deleting my "turklebaum" and think up some new terms to help describe the current literary atmosphere.

Aspbooker n. an obsessive reader. She was such an aspbooker about Harry Potter, it was embarrassing.

Canned adj. a term used to describe books that are popular with or come out of hispter/DIY culture. The second Werner Herzog read Go The Fuck To Sleep it became like uber-canned.

Chicortle v. the gag reflex resulting from an excess of chick lit. I'll totally chicortle if you recommend Jennifer Weiner one more time.

Libro Luddito, El n. any book or magazine being read in paper form; "Un Luddito" is a person who exclusively reads paper. Can you grab el libro luddito before it falls off the couch? My iPad died.

Movel n. a novel one's mom might recommend. Do you want this movel or should I just donate it?

Polybiblymous n. a person who reads using multiple formats. Look at that polybiblymous checking his messages. We could totally mug him.

Straight Veg n. any novel that is or will be considered a classic and that is actually awesome. Anna Karenina is straight veg, but I just don't have the patience for War and Peace (cf. "War'n'Rainbows") .

War'n'Rainbows adj. a person or book trying too hard to impress others. War'n'rainbows also suggests intellectual weariness. That Adam Levin book The Instructions was just too war'n'rainbows for me, and it gave me scoliosis.

What other new phrases might be useful? What should we call housewives who read porn in plain sight? Or the book that isn't out yet but you've already heard so much about you're no longer interested? Feel free to offer your suggestions below. Or just threadjack the comments.