Melville House summed up a study suggesting that getting buzzed can enhance creativity. Here's your chance to test those findings, and maybe even win a prize for your efforts. Pour yourself a glass of "sudden insight" and read on.

"/> What if Alcohol Helped You Write? Find Out with the Black Balloon R.A.T.! — The Airship
By James Rickman

Last week, the internet renewed its assault on clear-headedness, self-discipline, and everything else I thought writers were at least supposed to possess. Melville House summed up a study suggesting that getting buzzed (just under the legal driving limit) can enhance creativity. It's a lot like the research I kicked around here a couple months ago, on the surprisingly beneficial effects of drowsiness.

What the hell? Since when did feeling assed out make us better writers? And what, exactly, do these mind-blurring factors improve? The alcohol study, which you can trace back to a University of Illinois grad student, used the Remote Associates Test (RAT) to measure creativity under the influence. You've seen these RATs before. They're the ones where you seek the connection between three seemingly unrelated words. So if the problem isCall / Pay / Line, the answer is...wait, when do we start drinking again?

Oh right. The answer is "phone," as in phonecall, payphone, and phone line. But I've got a better idea. Pour yourself a nice tall glass of "sudden insight" and try this Black Balloon-themed RAT. All you've got to do is let your mind wander (and if you get stuck, do a little digging through our recent posts). If you hit that boozy sweetspot—i.e., if you don't immediately get bored and start googling talking cats—you might just win a copy of our brand-new title, Louise: Amended.

Gag Base Power  
Strip Light Engine  
Anne Brown Paddy  
Fetish Behind Candy  
Cookbook Undies Manhattan  
Mob Pin David  
Christian Poupon Hound  
Men Cap Cow  
Feed Cooper Skirt  

No need for an answer key. If you followed the instructions and are now on your third drink, you already know that the answer to all of the problems is, "You're not the boss of me."

But if you managed to tame this RAT, send your answers to The highest score gets a copy of Louise: Amended, which, as the true story of a young writer overcoming brain damage, makes the whole should-I-drink-while-writing issue seem a little silly.